2 steps to happiness

We think that our happiness depends on our circumstances in life. But when we really think about it, our happiness is entirely up to us.

Photo by hedgiecc

“Are you happy?” I asked a friend who was recently receiving so much accolades for her various achievements.

“I’m okay,” she said. “I am thankful for the awards and recognition. But I feel tired because of all the work. And there is still so much I want to do: I want to study, I want to make movies, I want to teach…”

“Then why don’t you?”

“I don’t have a choice. I have to work and I just don’t have the time.”

The work trap: a happiness zapper

It’s the all too familiar work trap we all get into one time or another and, more often than not, it’s zapping our happiness.

Liz Strauss recently wrote a post about work / life balance and a study about how people spend most of their time. And the findings indicate that most people spend their waking hours at work.

If you love your job, then good for you.

But if you don’t, then what an unhappy situation that would be

I wish I could say “Quit your damn job and do what makes you happy. Don’t worry, the money will follow.”

In most cases, this is easier said than done because not everyone can take that risk.

But does that mean we’re stuck and we don’t have a choice?

It doesn’t.

Because we are in charge of our own happiness and we can choose to be happy if we want to.

2 steps to happiness

Whenever I get into a slump, I follow these two steps to make me happy:

1. Make a simple happy list.

List down all the simple things you do that make you happy. Whether it’s writing in your journal, getting a massage, reading a book, blogging or chilling out to your favorite tunes, think about all those things that instantly pick you up.

You can make a big list too outlining all the grand things that you want to do like taking that backpacking trip or publishing a book. But a simple happy list is good for starters then just work your way up the list as you go along.

2. Do one happy thing everyday.

Pick just one happy thing from your list and make time to do it every day. Even if you’re the type who runs on a tight schedule, make sure to set aside time for your “happy thing.” Block it in your daily schedule and consider it like you would a business appointment. Remember you are entitled to your own happy time as much as anyone else.

When you’re ready, move on to the next item on your happy list until you’ve run through all of them. When you’re done, make a new one!

Of the two steps, this is the most important one because no matter how long your happy list is, if you don’t actually make the time to do any of them, it won’t make a difference.

A note about “I don’t have the time” excuse: We all have enough time, we just choose to spend it on other things that we think are important to us.

A bonus tip

A quick way to shift to happy mode: SMILE.

I know it may feel awkward or silly to just smile for no reason.

But just try it, smile and see if you don’t feel a bit better.

I find it hard to feel bad when I’m smiling.

What’s in your happy list?